Remember how simple life was when we were kids? We just got up everyday and lived. In the middle of living, we’d eat, get dirty, make messes, do chores, ride bikes, eat more, laugh, play stupid-yet-fun games, eat again, laugh, run around outside until dark, take a bath, go to bed….then get up the next day and do it all again.
Simple.
I don’t remember being worried, feeling out of balance, overworked, uber-stressed, self-conscious, anxious about the future, exhausted – I mean, who had time for all that when there was an awesome “dirt hills” a block up the road where you could ride your bike all day and the creek nearby where you could catch crawdads?
Maybe not everyone grew up in the “Wonder Years” euphoria, but, for the purpose of this post, I am referring to the way I grew up. A very average upbringing and in that sense, a very blessed life.
I can’t say that my adult life has been so simple. It hasn’t been bad, but it’s just what happens when you become an adult. Our parents were right when they told us to enjoy our childhood, because being an adult meant a whole lot more responsibility. I’ve also learned that the adult life also brings more reality that, as parents, we try to shield from our kids so they can be, well, kids.
I think we make life too complicated sometimes. We focus on things that don’t need to have our focus. We put our trust and security in things, that should never hold that place in our lives. We compare our lives with those we see on Facebook, Instagram and all the other social media platforms out there. We try to live up to expectations from the world, that aren’t really there. We stress over things that don’t deserve that energy from us. We allow ourselves to get weighed down by things that really don’t have the right to infiltrate our very livelihood. We fight. We argue. Even with people we don’t know, thanks to social media. We’ve completely missed what life is truly about.
I don’t believe God created the human race to live under such pressure. I don’t believe He ever wanted man to let go of their purpose and drive, in order to be crushed by the weight of this world. I also believe that if we find ourselves in this place, that, for the most part, it has been because of our choices. Every choice we make will impact our tomorrows. We live in a fallen world, so there will be hardships and trials – but how we choose to respond to those is 100% up to us.
For example…when my son lashes out as his sister in anger and rudeness and we have to have a little chat about his actions – his first response usually starts with, “But, Bella made me….!”
No, no, no! That answer doesn’t fly with this mama! My response usually is, “I don’t care what Bella did to you – right or wrong – you have a choice in how you will respond and in this house, we are kind and we love one another. Nobody makes you act a certain way but YOU.” I know this isn’t easy, but it is a rule in our house. I also tell my kids that for the rest of their lives people will do things that hurt them. They’ll say mean things, do mean things and just be plain mean. I let them know that they have to choose the right way to respond to all of that, or they will live in a terrible place of anger, bitterness, rage and unforgiveness. They will be the ones to allow the pressure, stress and weight to overtake their lives. As Christians, we are told to love one another. There are no conditions to that. It doesn’t say that we are to love one another “unless they do something mean to you”. Nope. Love. Love responds differently than the world does and that’s what we strive for in our home.
These past few months has brought a lot of “life” that makes me have to think like an adult and respond in the right way. Situations that have made me think more seriously about life, how I’m living it, and what I’m doing with my time. Even Charley talked about how he’s had this going on in his own life in his post last week, perspective…or lack thereof.
Here we are in the middle of preparing for our 52 week road trip – and having a great time doing it. Sure, some of it’s overwhelming, because I try to do 137 things at once, but that’s just me. But, we’re having fun. Sometimes I feel like I did when we were planning our wedding and preparing for life as husband and wife. It was so new for both of us. It was unknown, exciting, new and absolutely exhilarating! Planning for this trip is the same to me. Neither of us have any idea what we’re doing, which is probably why it’s so fun! We’re making lists (oh, how I love lists), making Excel spreadsheets (Charley loves these) and making really long wish lists on Amazon of all the things we’ll need for this trek across the United States. Some fun stuff (like GoPro accessories) and some absolute necessities (like sewer hoses), but to me it’s like a wedding registry.
This can make any girl giddy.
Then you hear news. News from friends. News from church. News from family. Like three weeks ago our Pastor’s 22 year old son ended up in the ER after a sinus infection crossed over into his brain and he woke up one morning unresponsive. He had swelling in his brain along with a terrible infection. He has had 2 brain surgeries and is still unable to move anything on the right side of his body. He’s still in the hospital and they are hoping to get a room at Craig hospital here in Denver, Colorado. Naturally, he has a long road ahead of him, but thank God that he is alive. Then a girl I new in high school had to be permanently put in a home for those with dementia. She’s not even 40. She is married, has 3 kids – and has no idea who they are anymore. This is not okay. We have a family member who is said to only have a few weeks left of her life to live. What? This is just three of so many other situations going on in the lives of the people we personally know.
All of this is so heartbreaking and sometimes so much to wrap my head around. Especially when my family is in the middle of planning something so fun and amazing. I am so grateful for my life. As Charley mentioned last week, I had a close call back in September of 2016 after returning home from our family vacation in Playa del Carmen, Mexico. That incident made an impact on me in a way that nothing else has. When you know that you could have had your last vacation with your family, you want to “make each day count”.
Yes, I got that line from Titanic. Jack sure knew how to make a point. And I still love movie lines.
But all that is for another post and another time.
So, in the middle of all the heartbreak and sadness, we all still need to make sure we are doing everything we can to live our life to it’s fullest. We need to make sure our choices will keep us off the path of stressful and burdensome living. We need to make sure we don’t allow the heavy situations surrounding us to weigh us down. We can’t get caught up in fear and grief and sadness. Because it’s real and if you don’t watch it, it can become your focus.
Sure all of those things are there – but we need to rise above all of that and train ourselves to live and enjoy the life we have been given. Touch the lives of people around you by being a light in their darkness. If you are healthy, help those who are not. If you have money, help those who do not. If you have food, help those who do not. If you have joy, share it with someone who does not.
Cherish each day. We can’t let any day go to waste. As I tell my kids, you don’t get today back, so make sure you are proud of how you lived it. Do I always follow my own amazing advice? Sadly, no. But each day I get up I definitely have this as a goal.
My life….I want to live it well.
This doesn’t always come naturally as adults and we may have to make an effort, but it’s worth it. We need to enjoy our lives, enjoy the people in it and know that we are here for a reason and with a purpose. Even when life around us seems hard, we all need to keep going and we need to make the most of every moment.
Live like a kid again. Get up and live your life, don’t let your life live you. Laugh. Play. Get off social media and do something that matters to you and others. Get outside and get some fresh air. Throw conventional out the window, quit your job and take a year long road trip (wink wink). Don’t worry about how you measure up to one of your 1,672 friends on Facebook. Besides – how many of those 1,672 friends can you call in the middle of the night or in a crisis and have them by your side?
Exactly.
Life can be simple, even as adults. We are the ones who have complicated it. Yes, there is more responsibility, but God has given each one of us the ability to handle it. He has given us His Love, so we can respond to all of life’s situations in a way that won’t decrease our life span.
You get to choose how you live your life.
As for me, I choose to live it well.
xo Kari